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by Rachelle Shonwise

Have you ever looked at a day spreading in front of you with a hundred things already clamouring for your attention and wondered what was most important? Or looked back at a day of responding (reacting more often than not in my case) and wondered if the things that demanded your attention were really the most important? As homeschooling moms (and dads, but that’s a perspective I have yet to experience), there are a myriad of urgent things pulling our attention this way and that. There’s the house to clean, run, organize, and maybe even decorate. There are meals to be planned, shopped for, prepped, cooked, served, and cleaned up. There are people to be cleaned, listened to, read to, taught, encouraged, held, and driven to places. There’s schooling planning to be done (or at least thought about), curriculum to be evaluated, bought, and (hopefully) implemented. There are ideas to consider and then communicate. And that’s all without really taking into consideration life outside of our kids and households!

Some days I miss the simplicity of the diaper days– the days when life was crazy, but I knew I’d changed the diapers, read to the kids, and kept them all fed, and that was the most important. Of course, I then remember the struggle of having multiple urgent needs pulling me more ways than I was capable of going, and then remind myself that every stage has its joys and challenges. If the truth be told, it doesn’t matter which stage of life I’m in, I resonate with Anne Morrow Lindburgh when she longs for, “a ingleness of eye, a purity of intention, a central core to my life that will enable me to carry out these obligations and activities as well as I can. I want, in fact—to borrow from the language of the saints—to live ‘in grace’ as much of the time as possible.” Isn’t that what each of us desire on some level? To know what a rich and sustainable life looks like, a life that ends with “Well done, good and faithful servant”?

I think to find that clarity and singleness of purpose we have to start first with the why, and then with the how of our calling. Matthew 28:19-20 says, “Go and make disciples of all nations, teaching them to observe all I’ve commanded you.” Jesus’ final command to His disciples before He left was simply to continue what He had started—making disciples. Every one of us has a mission, and the foundation of every mission is that call to discipleship. When we become parents, our mission field sharpens into focus with our kids as our first priority. While I’ve found that God uses this hidden, intensive discipleship program of parenting to prepare us for a mission field outside the home, as long as we have kids, discipling them is our first responsibility. Our “why” is to fulfill that calling to discipleship.

Discipleship is the act of doing life shoulder-to-shoulder and face-to-face with another, and using that life to point them toward what is good, true, and beautiful, and ultimately, to God. But here’s the kicker. You can only give what you have. You can only teach what you know. And you can only model what you see– what is filling your mental vision. This means our “how” has to start a little closer to home. To disciple well starts with a commitment to personal growth and an understanding of what it means to allow the life of Christ to live through us. To worry less about curriculum and parenting styles and more about keeping
our eyes on Christ.

In essence, a life of clarity and purpose begins with being before doing; with making space to fill our hearts and minds with what is good, true, and beautiful, so we have something to share. I am reminded of Jesus’ interaction with Mary and Martha during His time on earth. Jesus commended Mary’s choice to sit at His feet and learn, to even step out of the bounds of what society found acceptable in order to hear His words and be in His presence. This doesn’t negate doing—on the contrary, our sense of peace and confidence in the doing comes from first being transformed by His presence.

It’s a funny thing really, the fluid nature of time. So often I think I don’t have time to be quiet, to sit and read, to journal and pray, to listen to the still small voice of the Holy Spirit. And yet, when I do take that time, it repays itself tenfold in clarity of purpose, in peace, and in the ability to remember who I am in Christ. So much of my stress is uncertainty and worry about what might happen or what the most important thing is for me to do. Often the thing that is most needful is not the loudest or most demanding action, nor is it often the thing I feel like doing. More often than not I want to DO something concrete and measurable, rather than building rhythms of slow, hidden heart work that don’t seem to bear fruit for years. I was recently challenged and encouraged by this reminder from Reclaiming Quiet:

“We have to live in such a way that knowledge ripens in body as well as mind, in affection as well
as word, as we mold our lives by eternal rhythms and shapes rather than those of a fallen world.
“We are asked to shape our lives, our time, our attention by habits and rhythms radically different
from the windblown fury of the broken world. This means an entirely alternate shape of life, not just
the subtraction of screens and distractions but the embrace of prayer, of daily wonder, of listening, of
trust, of celebration that roots us moment by moment in that deep, watchful quiet that ushers us
into the presence of God.”

Building habits of quiet, of sitting in the presence of God and doing the work of excavating the lies and fears that are bombarding my mind, and then bringing them before Him to be remade is the work. Investing time to find Scripture that speaks truth to the lie I’m believing and worshipping Him for what He says is true (as opposed to what I feel) transforms me and enables me to have something to share with my kids. Sara Hagerty sums this up so perfectly in Adore:

“Adoration is where we bring our raw vulnerability– our ‘what I actually believe about You, God’– to
the place of His truth, expecting Him to change us…Adoration is not an exclusion of our emotions.
Adoration never requires us to shut down our emotions. On the contrary, it invites us to bring
them– all of them– to God. God does not want our polished pretenses. He wants our whole selves,
and He wants us to come honestly. So He invites us to wrestle.”

This is the most important work. Choosing to courageously face our doubts, fears, and questions and doing the hard work of wrestling with God that will allow His life to be lived through our unique personality, circumstances, and family. This doesn’t mean perfection —far from it. Our kids don’t need perfection, they need to see us running with our frailty to Christ.

“(Your kids) don’t need you to be a perfect example of Christlikeness. Your goal is not for them to be your disciple, after all. They need you to point them to the One who is worthy of following. The daily battles of discipling may make you wonder whether you’re toiling in vain. But keep pressing in. You can’t expect a harvest during planting season. Concentrate on reaching the heart of those you’ve built relationships
with, and time will take care of the rest.”

Our job is simply to allow the Holy Spirit to work in us, to faithfully do the work He brings to our attention each day, leaving the outcomes in His hands, and trusting Him when He says, “He who began a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.” May we keep our eyes fixed on Christ, sitting at His feet as a disciple first and then allowing His life to make disciples through us

Rachelle Shonwise is a third generation homeschooler, mom of five boys and one daughter, ages 7-16, and has been married for seventeen years to her favourite person, Josh. They have run a plumbing business for the past fourteen years and are currently transitioning into pastoring the Wimborne Alliance church.
Rachelle loves reading, gardening, and people. Nothing fuels her tank so much as engaging in a good discussion about ideas with others.

Dave and Aline Stasiewich began home schooling in Edmonton in 1983. That same year they began hosting informal meetings at their house with a small number of other home educating families. The numbers of people attending continued to grow, so the meetings were moved to the Mill Woods Recreation Centre. This group became known as the Christian Home Educators (Edm) Association. It would later adopt the name Home School Christian Fellowship and it continues to thrive.

Back in the mid-1980s many home educators lived in fear due to the hostile climate for people who didn’t send their children to public school. Some home schooling parents were visited by truancy officers, while others had to deal with social disapproval. These were not good times for home education (van der Ahé 2013, 4-5).

Dave and Aline Stasiewich met with the Minister of Education to advocate for home education, but it became apparent that a provincial association for home educators would be helpful in negotiating with the Minister and his Department.

Together with some other parents, Dave and Aline Stasiewich formed the Alberta Home Education Association (AHEA) in 1986. Pioneering home educator Merv Tuplin told this author that Dave and Aline basically initiated the whole thing.

AHEA was officially incorporated on November 26, 1986. The five signers of the request to register the organization under the Societies Act were Gordon Schiffner of Edmonton, Marie Erdmann of Calgary, Nora Harder of Medicine Hat, Carolyn Dykstra of Edmonton, and Stockwell Day of Red Deer. At the time, Stockwell Day was a rookie MLA in the Progressive Conservative government of Premier Don Getty. It is noteworthy that the signers represented many areas of the province.

Willing Non-Resident Boards

After its formation in 1986, AHEA was immediately busy with pressing the government to include provisions for home education in the new School Act. With the passage of Bill 27 (the new School Act) in 1988, the next item on the agenda for AHEA was the home education regulations. The directors of the association urged all members to write and call their MLAs, the Minister of Education, and the director of the Legislature’s education caucus, Halvar Jonson. Many members did call and write, clearly indicating to the government that home educators were concerned. As a result, AHEA representatives were invited to speak to the education caucus. After the AHEA presentation, the minister assured the AHEA directors that they would get some input into the forthcoming regulations (Stasiewich 1988, 1).

AHEA received a draft of the proposed home education regulations on November 4, 1988. The Deputy Minister of Education, Reno Bosetti, then called a meeting for November 15, 1988 for all home educators and their organizations to attend. AHEA urged every member to attend and indicated that the outcome of this meeting was crucial because the proposed regulations were not acceptable:

For all intent and purposes, there is NO PROTECTION for home education parents. The bottom line is that, yes, you the parents have the legal right to educate your children at home, but we, the state, have the legal right to virtually tie your hands if we wish to do so, with time and curriculum requirements. And if you don’t do exactly as we say, we the state, will force your children into an institution of our choice, teaching them the philosophical curriculum of our choice. Alberta Education wants CONTROL of the PROCESS!

AHEA Newsletter 1988, 3

Many home educators did show up for the meeting. Ray Strom writes, “To the surprise of the department officials, the room was jammed with home educators. It was soon determined by those officials that home educators were a determined and serious group” (Strom 2003, 5).

The Home Education Regulation was released on February 28, 1989. AHEA immediately began trying to identify willing non-resident boards. Dave Stasiewich wrote to the members:

Please let me know of any board that is very reasonable towards home schooling and wants to co-operate. We want to publish all the boards that we know of that are interested in home schoolers and want to co-operate with us in our next newsletter. The directors of the Association will also be contacting school boards and discussing home school arrangements with them.

Stasiewich 1989, 1

The search for willing non-resident boards turned out to be a very difficult task. Apparently, there was a kind of peer pressure among the boards not to accept students from other jurisdictions. A board that did accept students from other jurisdictions would be considered a “skunk in the chicken coop,” as Ray Strom put it. Thus home educators were stuck with their resident boards, many of which were unfavourable.

It wasn’t until 1991 that a breakthrough occurred. In September of that year AHEA discovered that the Assumption Roman Catholic School District #50 in Oyen was open to being a willing non-resident board. Harold Elias and Ray Strom from AHEA spent a considerable amount of time negotiating an agreement with that board. AHEA then prepared a notification form to be filled out and faxed to Assumption. With only three days remaining before the deadline for notifications to be received, over 100 students notified with that board (Strom 2003, 6).

This was the turning point. Notifying with a willing non-resident board was no longer just a legal possibility but a genuine reality. But entrenched interests were not pleased by this breach in the dyke. As Ray Strom related,

The repercussions were stupendous, with school boards crying with outrage, and the Department immediately jumping all over the Assumption district, trying to find loopholes to shut them down. None were found, thankfully. The dye had been cast, and there was no turning back.

Strom 2003, 6

I was asked an interesting question at the AHEA convention this past spring that I was glad to answer, and I thought that it might be a question that others were asking. The question was simple and went something like this; “Why is it that homeschooling has such strong Christian roots?” Now, admittedly not all homeschoolers come from a Christian perspective, and the reasons a family might choose to homeschool can be diverse; but the Christian belief lends itself to the venue of homeschooling in many ways. This is a condensed version of my answer.

First off; ‘Why should we educate our children in the first place?’ I have commented in the past that the main reason that a child should learn to read is so that they can read the Bible. The Bible is our lifeline to the truth and therefore essential reading if we are to live the Christian life. I have gone so far to say that if an individual is not going to read the Bible it would be better that they should not read at all; but I would also argue that everyone should learn to read so that when the time comes that they should desire to read the Bible, that they should already know how to read.

I have gone so far to say that if an individual is not going to read the Bible it would be better that they should not read at all

Second; Christianity is a belief system with morals and a code by which the individuals must govern themselves. Although Christians are admonished to be peaceful and to honor the King (government), there may come a time when as a Christian there is the need to defy the ruling authority, because Christians are called to serve God first. In the past, education began within the walls of the church. Even the Jews had their children taught by the Rabbis’, their religious leaders. Many of the famous Universities and Colleges began with the desire to educate the next generation of ministers for the pulpits. Alas, as is the way of mankind itself, these institutions veered from their original path and became secularized, and in the end became antagonistic to the very goal with which they began. Public Education was not a problem for the Christian in the beginning because of its’ strong Christian roots; but these too began to erode in the early to mid-1900s. This was due in part to the multi-cultural nature of our country, but primarily to the afore mentioned secularization that is pandemic today. Had the schools stuck to the academics of reading, writing and arithmetic likely nothing would have change. Instead, the school system became centers for social reform. Starting with the thrust of evolution, which stripped mankind as the special creation of our Creator and reducing our children to advanced animals with no special place in the world. In the 1960s came the sexual revolution and the emphasis on safety rather than moral standard. Of course, Christians became concerned and began to resist this trend.

Christianity is not governed by Government, though it should honor that same entity. The Christian is under God and accountable to Him. If our God is the one and only true God of all, then His rule transcends national boundaries. Christianity is therefore super-national. In the past every nation had its own deity, and though countries often merged and replicated these deities, in the pagan mind there was a myriad of gods to choose from. The Jews had the one and only true God but were eager to hold Him to themselves. If an outsider wished to serve their true God, they were instructed to become Jews. It doesn’t make sense however that The Creator of all should be limited to one nation and one locality. Jesus, God in flesh, exploded onto the scene and Christianity became the light of the whole world. As culture erodes, it is the Christian who is most likely to resist, and in a quiet way declare war on that same culture. We stand for truth and wish it to be taught to our children and will teach it to them ourselves as our God given responsibility.

Many of the famous Universities and Colleges began with the desire to educate the next generation of ministers for the pulpits.

In any homeschool environment there comes a time when you teach the young ones about weights and measures. In our culture the accepted standards are either the Metric system or the Imperial system. Each has its advantages and disadvantages. In a perfect world, the Metric system with its emphasis on the base 10, which is, of course, the same as our numerical system, works the simplest. All standards of measure relate to each other in one way or another, and once understood, provide simple ways for the varying measures to interrelate. On the other hand, because we did not start with the Metric system, measures of length often still relate to the Imperial system, simply because the land itself is
divided into miles and not kilometers. Building design is still often done in feet and inches. Some smaller projects are done in millimeters, but on big buildings these numbers become astronomically large. On the whole, either system works simply because it is standardized. This has not always been the case.

“The problem results that not everyone shares the same
cubit measure.”

If one is familiar with the scriptures, it is not uncommon to come across a measurement that is called a cubit. The cubit is the measurement from our elbow to the tip of our longest finger. This is commonly estimated at being approximately 18 inches. The problem results that not everyone shares the same cubit measure. Mine is 18 7/8ths. Noah’s Ark was measured in cubits, 300 x 50 x 30. If Noah’s cubit was 18 inches that would make the Ark, 450ft long, by 75ft wide, by 45ft high, but there is no saying that his cubit was only 18 inches. If it were 21 inches, as some suggest, suddenly a minimal change adds considerably to the end product. At 21 inches per cubit, the Ark would be 525ft x 87.5ft x 52.5ft. The volume of space would increase even more drastically from 1,518,750 cubic feet, to 2,411,718.75 cubic feet. More room for more animals, but difficult if one wishes to be certain about the size of his boat. What this highlights is the need for a set standard.

In a world of uncertainty, there is an increasing need for a set standard; specifically, a set standard for truth. There are perhaps any number of ways that God could have communicated His truth to His people. The Bible reveals a few; He could speak to us through dreams, like He did to Joseph in the book of Genesis; He could speak to us through prophets, as He did throughout the Old Testament; He could even speak to us through a mule, like He did to Balaam in the book of Numbers. The problem with this type of communication is that it can be very subjective. Different people might hear God say different things, but once they are written down, as all these examples are, they go beyond subjectivity. 

God communicates to us through His Word so that it becomes the basis for further understanding. God super-naturally produced the scripture; “but holy men of God spake as they were moved by the Holy Spirit” (2 Peter 1:21), and further He oversees the preservation of that Word, as is seen in the fact that it is still with us today despite generations of time and multiple attempts to rid the earth of its truth. Without this Holy standard we would be without the ability to discern what is true from that which is false. Jesus is, of course, as scripture teaches, the embodiment of the truth; but again, it is the written word that reveals to us who Christ is; the Son of God, the Holy One, our Redeemer, the Lamb of God, our Savior. 

The Bible is as important to us as believers, as an accurate tape measure is to a builder; without it the whole structure of our faith would be as frail as a building with walls of varying heights and a roof that does not fit properly. A breeze can come and knock it down. Jesus is the Rock, and His Word is the plumb line that keeps us straight upon it.

The Bible is as important to us as believers, as an accurate tape measure is to a builder

We have been homeschooling for over 27 years. We have eight children that we have homeschooled from the start. We’ve graduated 7 from high school and one from college. When I started this journey with our kids, the internet wasn’t in existence. We didn’t have cell phones and homeschool curriculum availability was limited.

As the years have passed, I’ve watched the internet, cell phones, and curriculum companies give us access to unlimited amounts of information. Although these can be helpful, I am also realizing how detrimental this seems to be, especially for those who are just beginning their homeschool journeys. 

For hundreds of years, children have been allowed to have plenty of playtime, spending hours building forts, making bows and arrows, collecting bruises and bloody knees, and loving every minute of it! They were engrossed in childhood. Our world has changed, but our children have NOT! 

They arrive in this world with many, many stages of development that they must walk through before becoming healthy, well-adjusted adults. Our job as parents is to provide an environment that allows them to do that well. Their health and wellbeing are dependent on it. 

The trouble is, as homeschooling parents, we are terrified that our children are going to fall behind “educationally.”
I am here to tell you that that IS THE LEAST OF YOUR PROBLEMS.

“What if I told you that the answer was not only incredibly
uncomplicated but will make your days much less stressful?”

As parents we are desperately trying to do what is best for our children. We are bombarded with information on parenting and homeschooling. We are running around stressed out and constantly second-guessing ourselves. In the meantime, our kids are feeling the pressure and it is eroding their mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual health.The results are that our kids are having to cope with the complexities of adulthood and losing their one chance to be a kid. In an effort to do what we think will ultimately benefit our children, we are, in fact, robbing them of the very thing they need to engage in higher learning and become well-adjusted adults.

So what do our children REALLY need? What if I told you that the answer was not only incredibly uncomplicated but will make your days much less stressful?SIMPLIFY.SIMPLIFY.SIMPLIFY

Children react to too much busyness and stress with a similar “crisis mode” response that a child in a war zone
would. Their coping mechanisms kick in because they simply don’t have the ability to process adult-type stresses.
In other words, we need to keep their lives very simple by allowing them plenty of time to play, explore, reflect
and release tension. They need to be allowed the gift of boredom which encourages creativity and self-
directed learning.

What this means for us as parents is that we are going to have to trust…trust our instincts to know when our kids are and are NOT ready for more. We need to filter unnecessary busyness. We are going to have to be the ones to protect our children’s childhood both by saying no to things that will chip away at their playtime AND by not loading them down with too much bookwork too soon.

Childhood isn’t something to “get through.” It serves a real and lasting purpose. It is the foundation for higher learning. Each stage of development brings them closer to adulthood. We want that to be a natural, whole process and that requires letting them be who God made them to be. We let them be kids so they can be healthy adults.

As homeschooling parents, we need to let go and trust our children’s natural ability to learn. “To believe these precious little ones are ready for our adult version of ‘education’ is one of the biggest mistakes we could make. A slower, gentler approach lends itself to growing WITH children so by the time they reach the age of 12-15 yrs, they are excited about all they can learn. Suddenly their learning takes off at warp speed and more than makes up for the ‘slower’ start.” (This is a quote from my simple, mercifully short book on homeschooling, called The Unhurried Homeschooler.)

I’ve spent over 31 years as a student of our kids, watching them absolutely thrive in this unhurried approach to homeschooling. It’s made homeschooling not only doable but enjoyable. The hardest part was not letting others determine how we would approach our days. I can tell you it was well worth the effort as I watch our kids launch into the world, not perfect, but definitely whole and healthy. They have fond memories of their childhoods and I wouldn’t go back and change anything about the way we approached learning. Our kids have turned out to be lifelong learners, but more importantly, close friends and well- adjusted adults.

“They need to be allowed the gift of boredom”